President's High
by NixonVixen
Summary: Richard Nixon is a new transfer student at the prestigious President's High and he has a lot to learn. *I suck at bios. Also, historical figures are not my own, I own nothing but the OCs*
1. Chapter 1

President's High

* * *

 _If you take no risks, you will suffer no defeats. But if you take no risks, you win no victories._

 _\- Richard Nixon_

* * *

 **Chapter 1**

 _Standing at the center of the massive stage, Richard couldn't help but be nervous. He was sweating profusely due to baking under a bright spotlight, as well as the anticipation of what was to come. He couldn't wait much longer or his heart might burst-_

 _Suddenly, Ryan Seacrest strutted onstage, doing that cocky little walk of his. He approached the microphone towards the front of the stage, a sealed envelope in one hand, a small mirror in the other. He glanced at himself in the mirror and winked._

" _Damn, I look good," he muttered to himself. The crowd screamed in delighted agreement and anticipation. Ryan flashed a dazzling smile at the audience._

" _MY EYES!" one woman screamed as she fell to the ground. Her eyes caught fire upon receiving the brute force and intensity of Ryan's smile, rendering her immediately blind and smitten by that classic Seacrest charm we all know and love. Ryan could only chuckle - he was used to this by now._

 _Suddenly the lights dimmed and a hush fell upon the once raucous crowd. Ryan set down the mirror and straightened his fuchsia bow tie. This was it - the moment everyone across the world had been waiting for._

"...Richard…"

" _The results are in!" shrieked Seacrest. He dramatically unsealed the envelope, his sight-stealing pearly whites sealed safely behind a rakish smirk as his eyes traced over the name on the card._

"...Richard…"

" _The_ winner _of the American Presidential Election is-"_

"RICHARD MILHOUS NIXON, GET OUT OF BED THIS INSTANT!"

With a start, Richard was jolted from his dream and jolted awake by his mother's voice traveling from the kitchen downstairs.

"I'M UP! I'M UP!" He called back before pushing himself out of bed and trudging downstairs to the kitchen, where his mom was whipping him up some breakfast. She placed a plate of food and glass down on the table.

"Hurry up and eat, Richard, your food's getting cold."

"Sorry mom, I was having that dream again…" Richard replied to his mother sheepishly.

"The one where Seacrest makes a woman's eyes burst into flame inside her head, rendering her blind and smitten?"

"Yeah, and I always get _so_ close to seeing who wins the American Presidential Election but then I-"

"Now now, enough with this Election talk. It's just a dream, sweety."

"Well, I made it in the Top Two this time," Richard replied, moodily.

"Of course you did, of course you did." Richard's mom patted his shoulder placatingly. "You've got bigger fish to fry, mister. It's your first day at your new high school, can you believe it?"

Richard shrugged, his face uninterested, but his clenching fists betraying his nervousness about starting his sophomore year at a brand new school where no one knew his name. Sensing her son's nerves, Hannah Nixon squished her son's big ol' face between her hands.

"You know, I made you your favorites-"

"Cottage cheese with ketchup and a glass of fine French wine," Richard said, his voice quivering with gratitude as his mom dropper her hands, allowing him to regard the spread his mom had laid out before him.

"You're the best, mom!" Richard beamed at his mom in gratitude, and she returned his face warmly.

"I know. Now eat up before it goes bad." And with that, Richard quickly ate his food and then scurried off to get dressed in his new school uniform - khaki pants, a crisp white button-down shirt, and a blue tie - and grab his packed backpack to head off to school.

He paused at the door and turned towards his mom, a nervous smile gracing his lips. Hannah handed Richard his bagged lunch and straightened his tie.

"Are you ready, Richard?"

"...I'm scared I won't fit in or make any friends," he mumbled back, embarrassed. Hannah winked and gave her son a peace sign.

"You'll be just fine, my boy. I know it. You're a Nixon, after all." Richard smiled and returned her peace sign with both of his hands.

"And everyone's gonna remember my name someday!"

"They sure are, bud." And with that, Hannah promptly pushed her son out the door and towards the school bus waiting outside. Richard ran towards the vehicle's open door as his mother waved tearfully at his back.

"I'm so proud of you," she murmured. "Have a great first day at President's High!"


	2. Chapter 2

_The presidency has many problems, but boredom is the least of them._

 _\- Richard Nixon_

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 **Chapter 2**

Richard quivered with nervous anticipation as he exited the bus that had transported him within the pearly white gates of President's High. As he looked around, he couldn't help but feel as if he was in another world. Young men and women in uniforms laughed, chatted, and lounged together, all projecting a certain air of youthful exuberance for what was to come.

With a low whistle Richard thought to himself that yes, these were definitely all high achievers. He couldn't help but begin to panic that he would fall behind, but before he could worry too much, he collided with something in front of him and was sent flying to the ground due to the force of the impact. Richard absent-mindedly rubbed his left hip and cursed himself for getting lost in his thoughts as he sat back on the concrete sidewalk leading up to the main school building and regarded the contents of his lunch that had spilled to the dirty ground.

"3 SECOND RULE!" a voice bellowed above him. With a start, Richard looked up to see that what he had collided with was not an object, but a instead a very large human being with a pale, wispy handlebar mustache.

"Uhh I-" but before Richard could finish apologizing for his inattention and collision, the big boy was already on his hands and knees stuffing Richard's dirty lunch into his mouth.

"Meatloaf, yummyyyyyy" the mustachioed fat boy cooed while shoveling food into his mouth. Richard felt as if he could cry - his first day at a new school really couldn't have gotten off on a worse foot. Just as he was about to break down in the middle of the walkway, a strong hand latched onto his forearm and lifted him back into a standing position.

"Uhh, you okay, man?"

Richard regarded his rescuer. He was a tall, handsome teen with a cigarette dangling lazily from his lips. Richard's eyes glistened with admiration and gratitude and he couldn't help but think to himself, _H-he's so cool_.

"Uhh, hellooo? Earth to new guy?" The young man was waving a hand in front of Richard's face, causing the latter to snap out of her reverie.

"Oh hey, uh sorry about that. Thanks so much for helping me out…" Richard trailed off, and the boy smiled and effortlessly jumped in, introducing himself with a firm handshake.

"The name's Barack, but you can call me Barry. And you are?"

"Oh! Um Richard, that's me. I'm Richard Nixon. Nice to meet you Barac-, I mean, Barry."

Barack couldn't help but chuckle at the bumbling boy before him.

"Nice to meet you, Richard! You're new here, huh?" Richard hung his head and scuffed his new black dress shoes on the pavement below him.

"Was it that obvious?"

Barack quickly shook his head and waved his hands good-naturedly.

"No, no, no, you're fine, man. It's just that I know everyone around here and didn't recognize you. Glad we could meet!"

"Me too."

"Sorry about your lunch, though," Barack gestured with a small laugh down to the fat boy who had by then completely consumed Richard's lunch and was licking the nasty sidewalk beneath his massive body. Richard gagged at the sight. Not able to manage words at the moment (for fear that he might barf up his precious cottage cheese breakfast), he just shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. Barack patted him on the back sympathetically.

"Say, how about to make up for your rough start to the day, and since you're new and all, I show you around the building, introduce you to some people?" Richard's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets as he regarded Barack with wonder.

"Y-y-you would do that? That'd be amazing, yeah, wow. Thanks Barry!" Barack grasped the butt of his cigarette and expertly flicked it to the ground and smothered it under his shoe.

"Hey man, it's no problem. Us President's High kids have to stick together." Richard excitedly gave Barack a peace sign in gratitude and agreement, and Barack laughed politely, slightly confused but entertained but the weird new kid in front of him. Then he pointed at the fat kid.

"Let's start our tour here. That's William Howard Taft-" William grunted in greeting.

"-He's the fattest kid at school, weighting in over 350 pounds right now, but he's pretty cool overall. You know, when he isn't eating your lunch from the dirty ground." Richard and Barack laughed before moving on. On the way to the school's entrance, the two boys passed a literal orgie happening in the middle of the lush, green front lawn of the building. Richard gasped and covered his eyes immediately, while Barack sighed.

"Buried somewhere under all those women is Bill Clinton. The dude's an animal. Really. I don't know how he does it. You can uncover your eyes, by the way. Unless you want to run into someone again." Richard laughed sheepishly and uncovered his eyes before staring in wonder towards the orgie. Bill now sat atop the pile of naked women, playing a saxaphone and wearing nothing but a black tie.

"Wow…" Richard sighed in admiration and wonder. Barack chuckled.

"Yeah, he's, uhh, something else." They walked on, entering the school building. "Anyway, here's the main entrance. Down this long hallway you've got the junior and senior lockers and some classrooms. If you walk all the way down the hall and go up a few flights of steps, you've got the freshman and sophomore lockers."

"Oh, neat. I'm a sophomore, so I guess I'll be upstairs," Richard replied as he gazed around the fancy and clean private school around him. "Wow, this place looks like Chilton." Barack stared back blankly. Richard attempted to explain his reference, having the decency to at least be slightly embarrassed. "Uh, y-you know, Chilton. It's the school Rory transfers to in _Gilmore Girls._ "

"Sure man, I believe it," Barack responded kindly. Eager to change the subject for both of their sakes, he pointed at an immaculately groomed rich-looking boy in a white polo shirt and salmon-colored pants, with a white cardigan tied the preppy way around his neck. The rich kid strutted through the halls playing a violin, clearly in his own little world. Barack rolled his eyes.

"That there is Thomas Jefferson. He's a huge prep, is super rich, and excels in most areas. First chair for violin in the school orchestra. He's impressive, but way too stiff, in my opinion."

Both Barack and Richard suddenly had their attention pulled to a short boy who was furiously stomping after Thomas, screaming at the tall virtuous back.

"-I SAID I WASN'T FINISHED WITH YOU YET, JEFFERSON! WHY AREN'T YOU LISTENING TO ME, DAMMIT? HEY, ASSHOLE, GET BACK HERE OR I'LL RAM THAT PRECIOUS VIOLIN OF YOURS THROUGH YOUR SKULL-"

"And _that_ little firecracker is John Adams. He's brilliant, but annoying as hell."

Thomas used his long legs to glide down the hall and flee down the stairs, while a red-faced John sprinted ragefully after him.

"He's terrifying!" exclaimed Richard.

"Believe it or not, those two are best friends," Barack replied with a slight smile. Richard blinked in surprise.

"This school is already insane," he said in awe.

"Don't I know it!" Barack laughed. "Anyway, let's head upstairs and find your locker." Richard flashed Barack another peace sign, which the cooler boy reluctantly returned, and then the two set off towards the freshman and sophomore wing of the building.

 _This is already shaping up to be quite the first day_ , Richard thought to himself with a smile. _Can't wait to see what happens next._


End file.
